Acceptance of Difference and Failure

The connection between ‘difference’ and ‘failure’ might not be  obvious at first, but it should become clearer as we go through the exercises today and tomorrow.

No one wants to fail.  That’s only human.  But no one can promise you success.

The fact is that failure is a part of everything we do.  Nowhere is this more true than in trading.

Even the best traders experience more losing trades than winning trades.  But they are winners overall for two reasons.  You are required to be able to replicate what they do.

First they accept that failures in the form of losing trades are  inevitable once you start to trade.  So they accept this – they don’t try to eliminate losing.

Second, they ensure that the winners are sufficiently numerous and sufficiently larger than the losers to ensure that they make a profit overall.  This is done by good market analysis and good risk control.

We are concerned with the former on these requirements in today’s exercise and in the final exercise tomorrow.

 

Task for Today

Sit comfortably and repeat the breathing meditation from Day 4.  It should be very familiar to you by now.

Sit now in a way that you think gives you a sense of authority and dignity, but do not disturb your meditating posture to any extent.  Perhaps just straighten up your back a bit.

Start with yourself and say to yourself:

May I be happy, healthy, safe and free from suffering.  May I be at ease with myself now and in future.

Take your time over this.  Image that each phrase is like a pebble being dropped into a deep well.  You need to listen for any response in the form of thoughts, feelings or body sensations.  There’s no need to judge what response appears, if any.  No-one knows you are doing this but you.

It can be more difficult for you to wish yourself well than you at first expect.  If you are not satisfied, think instead of someone who loves you.  It does not have to be a person – it may be your pet.

Now. Do the same for someone you love or have positive feelings towards.  You feel good towards them so it is relatively easy to wish them well. Say to them:

May you be happy, healthy, safe and free from suffering.  May you be at ease with yourself now and in future.

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Now move a little out of this comfort zone.  Think or a stranger you can visualize.  If this is difficult think of an acquaintance about whom you have no particular feelings or reasons to have feelings.  Say to them:

May you be happy, healthy, safe and free from suffering.  May you be at ease with yourself now and in future.

Stay with this until you get it right.  Visualize that person and wish them well.  Remember that even though you don’t know them and don’t know much about their life, they have a life, just like you.

They have all the emotions you have, with dreams and wishes, successes and failures.  Wish them well just as you would wish that people would wish you well.

Now think of someone with whom you have had some difficulty recently.  This should not be someone that has done you a great wrong, just someone whose behaviour has not been just as you would have wished.

You may have had some negative feeling towards them, you may still have that feeling.  Think of them and wish them well:

May you be happy, healthy, safe and free from suffering.  May you be at ease with yourself now and in future.

You are not committing to have good feelings towards them or to be their friend.  You are merely wishing them well without them even knowing.

Now do the same for everyone, even those you do not know.  Wish all people well:

May you be happy, healthy, safe and free from suffering.  May you be at ease with yourself now and in future.

Try to keep your mind focused on this exercise throughout.  If it wanders then bring it back in the way we have previously described.

Take a bit of time between each step.  Say the words to yourself and ponder them.  But don’t judge yourself in any way.

At the end stop and focus on your breathing for a minute.

Then make a note in your journal of any thoughts you have on this exercise.  It is not uncommon for many to feel a sense of lightness.  Did you have any such feeling towards the end?


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